As mentioned in a previous post I have been working long and hard to get my guild raiding. Today my guild is raiding without me and I'm pissed off! I have spent years working and pushing and trying to find the right officers while not alienating others in the guild. I worked long and hard fighting to make sure that the guild is great all around, not just a raiding superstore. Where we can do it all. Have fun, quest, pvp, be social and fit in raiding on a regular basis. Much easier done now in the days of Wrath then at any other time in WoW history. I am not raiding tonight because I can't stay up that late and continue to stay sane and awake and functional at work. It's my choice and a choice that I had to make but I am not happy with it.
In fact I'm pissed! I can't go.
All the hard work I put in and I can't go! Yes, it's great that the guild is going and I'm glad that they are. But I can't GO!!
Yes, the reason I did what I did was so that EVERYONE could raid and still feel like if they messed up, or if they couldn't make it that week they wouldn't be kicked to the curb. But I can't go!!
Me! The one who put it together, made it happen, pushed and kicked and pouted and screamed!! Made enemies of friends to promote people into positions that would benefit the majority.
The horrible awful side is that I don't feel I have the power to say "Hey, you need to make it work for me too." to the rest of the team, when I'm the odd man out. I am the one who said it doesn't work for me, not everyone else. Who am I to ask 9, 12 or 20 other people to change to accommodate me? But man...have I told you? I can't fucking go! and I really want to.
I can't bring myself to be that selfish so I'm screaming here. Maybe it's because I know that some guildies read this and maybe, just maybe, someone will rally for me. Honestly that is passive/agressive, and I know it. So I'm just ranting.
I know, that sometime down the line I will find a solution. At this moment I'm hurt and feel like I'm starting from square one.